Showing Up

September 19, 2020

There are so many people — and I mean hundreds of thousands, probably more — who are sweating blood to ensure favorable election outcomes all over the country. Working in ways big and small. It’s a lot. I don’t know if it’ll be enough; I hope so. The forces on the other side are formidable and they don’t play fair. I know better than to feel defeated, because that’s just not an option, but I do get so weary.

Nerves are so frayed.. reserves so depleted. It’s hard to have an ugly election on top of the other stuff.. stuff I’ve written obsessively about for months.

These times we’re living in.. I still just can’t believe it.

I think I gotta stop reading the news. I need not to hear stories about politicians who celebrated Ruth Bader Ginsberg’s passing. I need not to know about the unscrupulous politics of court packing.

Mood rating today: so very fragile

Sat alone in the candlelit darkness of Central Park tonight for a vigil for RBG. Missed three quarters of it because I got there late, but heard the final speaker and a closing song. Even just that was moving. Glad I made it.

Just.. sigh.


Here’s what doesn’t feel sad: I learned in a conversation with Peter yesterday that he’s been writing some letters–about thirty of them, he said–to voters in Michigan. Yes, handwritten letters to voters. He said a woman in his coop is politically active and somehow, through her, he came to write these letters. He mentioned it at the end of our conversation saying, “Oh, here’s something you might like to know.”

It absolutely was!

The call was unexpected; he’d called to check in about RBG. That gesture also worked its way into some aching little heart spaces. I so love him for that.

Anyway, that’s why I titled this Showing Up. Because he is. Our 22 year old. That means so much to me and is so hopeful. I really need to focus on that and remember, trite as it sounds, the future belongs to them. I think they can take it from here.. if we can just get out of the way. I think, in their hands, things will (eventually) be okay.

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