Life of Wry

It’s National Son’s Day!

Well played, Hallmark. And I mean that! I always appreciate an opportunity to reflect on my love, admiration and total delight in my dear son.

Here’s to you, Peter Keaton Frame! You’ve enriched our lives beyond measure.

This is one of my fave pictures of the three of us.

If it’s Wednesday, it must be pub quiz day. Pub quizzes are back, along with Dr. Andy as MC, and a whole bunch of the regular teams from pre-pandemic DeVere’s days. We’re back, too… we being our old team: Irish for a Miracle! But, as the weekly pub quiz has moved from the Irish pub to a more traditional brewery (Sudwerk), we changed our name to Hard at Werk (werk, get it? Sudwerk?).

I think there have now been six pub quizzes in this new iteration, and Hard at Werk has made three appearances. We finished in 5th place two of those times, just out of the running for prizes! There were about 18-20 teams tonight (a lighter turnout) .. so.. not too bad. Respectable.

So far, our players have included Jim and me, Bill, Paul, Andy and Eileen, and Carrie and Marc. Brian and Darlene have both indicated an interest, but haven’t made any quizzes yet.

Stay tuned… if we rise in the ranks, I’ll report out.

Those aren’t Vincent’s, they’re our Seussian, end of season sunflowers. Of course.

I read a passage in a book today that talked about Van Gogh’s sunflowers, though, and I liked it:

“Van Gogh painted those sunflowers exactly like he saw them, living creatures who existed with him on the verge of sanity: part nightmare, part daydream.”

The book was Oh My Mother!, written by Connie Wang. Yes, about a mother-daughter relationship. One of the rare times I actually finished one of my book group books!

Somewhere in the annals of Yolo County history, a certain land surveyor will have left his mark. There is more than a little pride in the fact that land boundary maps the county over (and not just Yolo) bear Jim’s seal. I don’t know Jim’s full body of survey work, but know it’s significant and lasting. Pretty cool!

We were driving back from the Sac Airport this morning* and Jim pointed out a line of orange-painted survey stakes on a piece of county property north/east of I-5. He surveyed it last week and the stakes were still there.

Look carefully…

Jim often remarks on one of the many benefits of his work….. tromping around in fields, or up and down mountains, on beautiful days, all by himself. He loves it.

Did a bit of googling about other famous surveyors … and found this. Jim’s in good company!

1. George Washington

One of America’s most famous (and earliest) land surveyors is George Washington himself. The young future president got his bright start at the age of 17 in 1749. It was not long until he was appointed to be the Surveyor General for Virginia. Washington actually played an essential role at this time, because surveying the land promoted expansion westward.

2. Daniel Boone

As an American pioneer and explorer from Kentucky, Daniel Boone resolved settler’s claims to land. The legend was known to have spent much of his time traveling around the American frontier. In spite of the fact that he had no formal schooling, Boone went on to become an expert tracker by the time he was a teenager. In the years following, he took to surveying.

3. Thomas Jefferson

George Washington wasn’t the only president to work as a surveyor. Thomas Jefferson was appointed to work as the Albermarle County surveyor in Virginia in 1773. He also promoted surveying by sending Lewis & Clark on their expedition to explore the land gained through the Louisiana Purchase.

4. Henry David Thoreau

Though most might know of Thoreau as an author, he actually became a surveyor in the 1850s before he published his books. Being a surveyor allowed Thoreau to use his career to facilitate his hobby. Thoreau used his observations to journal his ideas.

5. Benjamin Banneker

As a self-taught African-American mathematician and surveyor, Benjamin Banneker was remarkably successful. In 1789, Washington even appointed Banneker to be part of the team surveying the future site of Washington, D.C. The project took about two years.

6. Abraham Lincoln

The nation’s 16th president got his start as a self-educated man in Kentucky. He worked as a storekeeper and postmaster in addition to surveying land and studying law at the same time. It is clear that Lincoln was a man with a great deal of talent and many skills, seeing how much time he spent participating in different types of work before he became president.

7 & 8. William Clark & Meriwether Lewis

Lewis and Clark were tasked with some of the most intensive land surveying in American history. While Lewis had a reputation as more of a planner, Clark was an expert surveyor and mapmaker. Together, the partners traveled across the land then known as the Louisiana Purchase, making their way to Oregon to scout it out.

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(*) we finally signed up for TSA-pre. Yay us.

I have a lot of favorite trees in Davis, but that Zelkova on the north banks of Lake Spafford in the UCD Arboretum was probably at the top of the list. I always pointed it out to visitors, and I’ve taken dozens (and dozens, maybe more) photos of it at various times of the year.

Here’s what it looked like last fall…

It apparently had cracked under its own weight, literally. Arborists noticed the branches hanging down lower than usual and, upon inspection, discovered a crack. They removed 50% of its canopy, hoping that would ease the tension and allow the crack to heal, but it did not. They determined that it needed to come down.

Jim and I took a walk over there after brunch this morning to check it out…

Super sad to see it gone. Here’s another after and before…

I didn’t know Cap Thomson well — hardly at all — but, like most, knew of him. I do know, and have long admired, his wife Helen. I went to the Celebration of Life for Cap today because I knew it’d be a wonderful Davis community event — a coming together of a lot of Davis folks to honor a truly remarkable man. I wanted to be inspired by what is good about life in this community. I thought it would be the best kind of feel-good gathering. And it was.

Truly, the best of Davis.

I do, actually, have a story about Cap.

A few months ago (February), I was canvassing the neighborhood on behalf of Donna Nevelle, who was running in a special election for a vacated spot on the City Council (she went on to win that seat). I was in College Park, dropping flyers at every house, inviting neighbors to attend a Meet and Greet that Jim and I were hosting for Donna. I ran into Cap walking his Cairn terrier, something he did twice a day, at least. He was in front of his house, either coming or going. I said hello and he wondered what I was up to. I handed him a flyer and invited him to our house later that week.

What I remember was his kindness and enthusiasm. He eagerly motioned me to his front door and invited me in so he could tell Helen all about it. What impressed me was his immediate and complete attention to what I had to say and the way he engaged me fully. In that moment, he made me feel like I had the most important information in the world. Not patronizing in the least, just respectful and kind. When we walked through the door, he called for Helen. She came over, smiled, we talked briefly. Cap suggested to Helen that this would be a good thing to attend. She smiled again. Thanked me. Cap added his thanks warmly, said how nice it was to see me. He hoped they could both be there, even as Helen thought there might be a conflict. I left.

I remember walking away feeling like I had been so welcome, that I had useful information, that we shared common values. I felt absolutely like these guys were the best kind of neighbors. Not to make a huge deal out a small transaction, but quite honestly, it was a standout encounter.

It is exactly what every speaker said at the Celebration of Life. Cap was warm, gracious, kind, and humble. I learned a lot about his enormously significant contributions to the mental health field (he was an MD specializing in psychiatry) and everything he did for people with mental illness — on the most intimate and personal of levels, as well as his legislative accomplishments. A titan in the field and hugely respected. I also learned about his enduring love of Celtic music (of course the Putah Creek Crawdads), his athletic prowess (multiple marathons, major treks/hikes, Masters swimmer), love of the Sierra (a lifetime of backpacking trips), love of Scottish culture, love of family (I knew his oldest son Iain when he was a junior high school kid on one of the youth councils I supervised in the early 80s), a penchant for bad jokes and story telling, and that he was a lip-kisser.

Back to that mid-February neighborhood Meet and Greet… Helen did attend (it was so nice to see her), though Cap did not. I learned that at that time, he was in the throes of cancer (I believe) and would soon start hospice. He passed away at the end of July.

We started a new era today: the Matthew lives in Davis and is working on his PhD in materials science era! Which means, we hope, that we will see a lot of him in the next 4-5 years, which may also mean we’ll see more of John and Maita, maybe Monica and Dror, maybe a lot more Frames coming and going.

Jim and I want to do for Matthew what Claire and Lisa have done for Peter: provide a local resource, local family, surrogate parents, home away from home, port in the storm. Expressed mathematically, using the law of proportions:

We think of Matthew as our nephew, but in reality he’s our first cousin once removed (son of Jim’s first cousin). Whatever he is, it’s family and we’re here for it.

Here’s dinner tonight:

Today was Jim’s and my 27th year wedding anniversary. Yay us!

One of us remembered (bummer, it wasn’t me). I am truly wondering what is wrong with me that I forgot the day .. I *think* for the second year in a row. It WILL be the last time that happens. It’s more embarrassing than concerning. I mean, obvs! I love Jim dearly, value deeply the life we’ve built together and acknowledge that regularly. No hidden issues there. But damn! I gotta stop forgetting our anniversary.

Jim made a thing… a memento honoring the year… as is his tradition. I love these things so much. This one is made from the buttons salvaged from a falling-apart and holey shirt (the first clothing item Jim gave me decades ago). Jim dug it out of the trash (I’m in purge mode these days). I wore that shirt so much it literally wore out.

He’s a clever (and sentimental) one. Add that to the long list of why I love him. Note the Neccos — part of each and every one of Jim’s gift giving to me (except when they went out of production for a few years.. but they are back! I mean, who discontinues a candy that’s been around since 1847!).

We ate dinner tonight at Preserve (that’s become a bit of a tradition, too).

The drive to Winters…

This was the appetizer… elote — street corn with feta, jalepenos and cilantro. Very messy, hard to eat, a bit pricey for how much there is to eat.. but good. Jim had the sole, I had risotto w/ scallops.

We came home for dessert. I made a pecan pie this morning.. sort of a way to make up for my forgetting… it was made with love, for sure.

Buh bye palm trees and sunshine…

Buh bye Klondyke and Joey..

Buh bye family and friends, beaches and restaurants, nostalgia tours and so many good times. See ya all next Spring.

Today was another lovely day at Matt’s place… a great workout, a nice walk, dog time, a fun lunch out with Matt and a business partner Joe…

But the highlight of the day was siting in the Long Beach Wilson High School gym watching the varsity girls’ volleyball team beat Lakewood High School in four very close sets (best of five). Courtney, a sophomore, in her second year as a varsity player, plays offense and seemed to be a part of most rallies (do they call them rallies?).

Here are some pics:

The first thing I saw when I entered the gym.. Courtney’s name.

Here is the Courtney fan club: Grandma Judy (Staci’s mom), Matt, moi and Staci. We sat together mostly, but couldn’t talk — way too loud!

Before the game started, when the team was introduced..

Ready position. Once the ball’s in play, Courtney takes her position up at the net. Mostly she blocks, but she also gets the ball a bunch for point winning kill shots. Super fun to watch.

Courtney had a great game. She said it was a great night to be in the audience. She also said she played as well as she did because we were there to watch!

I don’t get to spend a lot of time with the Johnson kids — I see them once or twice a year — so this was just wonderful. Courtney’s adorable — very sweet, incredibly effervescent. She has after school and weekend jobs (Legends host, babysitting). As soon as she turned 16, she bought a car with money she’d earned. And she’s got practice daily, as well. She industrious! Lots of time management for that girl. She looks (always) like she’s having a ball.