The Colonoscopy
May 9, 2024
The morning started when my alarm went off at 5:00am. I then spent two+ hours in the bathroom dealing with this stuff …
I was completing a process that had begun last night. I was to drink a whole gallon of lemon-sweetened, laxative-infused syrupy water (one cup every 15 minutes) over the course of 4 hours — two hours last night, and two this morning. The regimen also included a couple of Rx items (a softener and something to address all the gas).
So.. you do all that, and voila!… you’re as clean as a whistle and ready for a camera to be inserted into the netherworld of your bowels… a camera that will offer up-close (and ever so personal) views of the walls of your colon hoping not to find anything too scary. Kind of a search and destroy mission… looking for polyps and, if found, removing them for lab analysis. I’ll learn in about a week if I have anything to worry about.
It seemed very appropriate that I spent my two hours this morning (tethered to the bathroom) watching the trump-hush-money-to-cover-up-an-affair-with-a-porn-star-so-he-could-win-an-election-fraud trial.
Both disgusting endeavors.
Life of Wry 